Wack-a-sannican

Well uh..Have you ever pwayed wack-a-mole? Well I wike to pway wack-a-sannican. She hides in between the recwiner and the table and then runs out and I wike to wack her wif my paw and then she runs backwards back into her hiding spot. Then she comes out again and I wack her again and she hides... this goes on for about 5 minutes until she runs on the other side of the recwiner and I can't wack her anymore. Anyways I fink I'm writing so many bwogs cause I just want to wet everyone know that mama and papa are coming home in 41 hours and 17 minutes...and I'm so freakin excited.

Wuv you mama and papa

Your wuving son
Kingston M.

Guess what?

Aunt Smeggs walked in wif a bag of how-o-peen-yo chips...you know what that means?!?! Papa's coming home....mama better be wif him...

Can't a bruvver get some sweep?

Well uh... I decided that wast night I would sweep in gwrammas room cuz..well uh..aunt winz moved out, and now I'm a wittle wonewy in the room by myself. So Gwramma sets up my bed all nice for me and I way down trying to get comfy and go to sweep. Well that wasn't gonna happen anytime soon. Sannican was so excited for me to be sweeping in the same room that she couldn't sweep. I sometimes have that effect on people and fings wike sannican. So as I was waying down she wanted to come pway wif me and she wanted food and she just kept getting up all night wong...she was so distracted...and awso..she is a brat. She gets up and down all night wong, so Fozzie (scaredy dog) goes up and ways by gwrammas head cuz he wikes to snuggle (hmm..) but then sandy goes and lays down up by gwrammas head, but everytime she does it, she sits on fozzie so he freaks out and gets up and weaves...it happens every night. So I finawy fall asweep and well uh...sometimes I snore...so stupid sannican decides to go and stand at the end of gwrammas bed and just stare at me...man...that was pretty scary when I woke up. She was just staring at me. Stupid sannican. Anyways just fought I would wet you all know how I've been..and how stupid sannican is doing.

Wuv you mama and papa,

Kingstom M.

R.I.P. Mr. Who

Happy Thanksgiving!!

I think its nice to take a day out of each year and remember the things you are thankful for. Why not take this same day to eat a bite of food for each thing your thankful for. I wike to call it giving thanks day and I wike to have it on the 4th thursday of November. I have found the trend picking up quite quickwy. Well uh I think I'm gonna write down all the things I'm thankful for.

1. Mama and Papa for saving my wife
2. My new fur fur furminator for helping me wose 2 pounds.
3. Giving thanks day for helping me gain 2 pounds squared (Aunt smeggs has been teaching me some math...I thought it sounded better than 4 pounds)
4. My Aunties for all the wuv they give me.
5. Gwramma for always remembering to feed me
6. Aunt winzy for wetting me sweep on her bed wif her the past month
7. Gwramma for making a wondeful thanksgiving dinner
8. my aunties for putting a piece of turkey, gravy, part of a roll, stuffing, corn, mashed potatoes and cranberries in my dinner tonight...oh don't forget the gwucosamine.
9. Sannican for always scratching my tummy.
10. My new fur fur furminator for making my coat shiny and new
11. Stupid sannican for providing entertainment all day wong.
12. Mama and Papa for always calling to talk to me
13. Mama and Papa for choosing to come home and see me for Christmas
14. Scooby Snacks...of course
15. Bwuuuuuuue Wake
16. My chuck-it
17. My entire famiwy because they all wove me so much

Well I fink thats it for now. Don't worry Mama and Papa, I ate enough Thanksgiving for all free of us.

I wuv you Mama and Papa,
Kingston

I am thee new Kingston M. "Furminator" Swater

Aww man I cannot tell you uhh how much I wuv this new brush gramma got for me, her favorite grandson. It's uh called a fur fur furminator. It's actuawy called a furminator, but I wike adding the extra furs because it sounds coower when I say it wike that. Anyways this thing is the best fing since scooby roo snacks.

So here's how my first fur fur furminating experience went. Aunt Winz started to brush me, and I felt wike I was in heaven. I actuawy fell asweep about four times while she was doing it. When I woke up I was on the kitchen fwoor with a huge pile of my fur next to me. I fought for a second Aunt Winz was herkin my gerkin, I was afraid I might be shaved or possibwy red white and bwue wike Sanican once was. But I wasn't. I gwanced at my back end (wike I did that one time I ate half the bag of doggie treats papa) and my hair was still there. Anyways I decided that I need not worry so I went back to sweep because the fur fur furminator felt so freakin good.

Aunt Winz furminated me for about an hour and she ended up filling 2 grocery bags full of my fur. I am now the silkiest puppy you will ever meet. The only possible way I can get any silkier is if I eat an entire box of scooby roo snacks because they're good for my coat. I cannot wait for my mama and papa to come home because they can even feel for themselves. I am wike a whole new dog after this fur fur furminator. It really is unbewievable. I will try and post pictures but Aunt Winz took em' wif her new phone and she needs to downwoad the software for them to woad. You can't really tell the difference by wooking though, you have to feel me. So mama and papa why don't you just come home earwee. Aunt Winz is so impressed by my new fur that she says she will even wet me ride in her new car! I reawwy cannot wait for everyone to pet me.

Anyways I hope everyone else out there with old yucky hair is as fortunate as me to get a fur fur furminator. It reawwy is worf the money, it even works on kitties! Anyways I'm off to sneak some scooby roo snacks to make my coat even shinier. I wuv the furminator!!!!

Wuv,
Kingston M. "Furminator" Swater

Hawwoween with the dogs

So I've heard I have become pretty famous over in Africa. I knew it would happen one day. Anyways...well lets see...nuffin to exciting has been happening watewey....just the norm...you know..dumb dumb pwaying awl day wong...fozzie gettin scared at gwramma cheerin for the seahawks...and of course..me being the best dog in the whole wide world. Anyways wet me tell you a wittle bit about hawwoween. Well Gwramma got everyone cool new costumes...wuckiwy for me, petco didn't have costumes in my size. Unwuckiwy for me though, gwramma found my superdog costume. Aunt Smeggs awso brought her camera home. You can tell how upset I was over the whole situation. Anyways Sannican got a "cupid" costume. Here's her costume

But when gwramma found my costume, she awso found fozzies old devil costume. It didn't fit him very well..it was a wittle too big...weird though..it fits sannican perfectwy

If you are wondering what I'm doing, I am actuawy trying to figure out the best way to chomp on her...Sometimes when she has this costume on, I wike to bite the horns and pull back to strangle her. only for a little bit. I awso wike to bite the back of her cape and pull forward. Its pretty funny to watch her try and get out. Anyways...when she has this costume on..she get a wittle frustrated because she can't walk, cause she always steps on her cape...so this next picture was an example of how she gets it off...wet me remind you that at the beginning of the flash her costume was all the way on...by the end of the flash this is what she looked like

Anyways ...enough of dumb dumb...Fozzie awso got dressed up...as a football pwayer...good thing it was onwy hawwoween....if he were ever a real footbawl pwayer he'd probabwy be dead by now...or running off the field and never stopping..scaredy dog.

This picture was mid bark...cause he barks so much cause he's awlways scared. Anyways I fink I might take a break from this writing to watch the rest of the seahawks game...its tied and in overtime..pretty sure fozzie is about to pee his fur because gwramma keeps yewwing...anyways I'll be back...


Kingston has officowy been hacked...by me...sannican. Anyways...well...I wanted to tell everyone about ME...my name is Sandy, otherwise known as Sannican by that big brown thing...he's my favorite. Ummm....well...I fink I will tell you what it is wike to wive in the wife of sannican.

midnight: Time for my midnight snack...jump down from the bed, get food, then wine until mommy wakes up and puts you on the bed.

1 am: bad dream..time to wake mommy up

free am: I have to go potty now! Wake up mommy

four firty: Winzy wakes up, which means kingston wakes up and we are reunited..I wuv it

four forty five: time for my morning sprints up and down the house

four fifty five: Keep away from mommy so I am not wocked up...

5:01-I'm wocked up for eternity..but communication wif kingston is still possibow...frew scratching at the door

8am-I have to go potty
8:01-not anymore!

uhh...

noon: I'm hungry

12:15 Time for my afternoon nap

two firty: I have to go potty again...

two firty one-Time for my after afternoon nap

five firty: MOMMIES HOME!!! My favorite part of the day..cause I awso get reunite wif kingston..we get frown outside though..until about five forty five...it's pointwess to put us out though...cause mommy doesn't know I went potty five minutes before she got home

Five forty Five: Time to pway for all the time I missed while wocked up for eternity. This incwudes Basketball...pwaying wif the growler (fozzie)...chewing on various objects found on the fwoor...my favorite being winzy's shoes...her new high heels are my favorite.

7 pm-DInner time...if mom remembers...

7:15...I have to go potty..

8-more pwaying...need to get in as much as possibow before being wocked up tomorrow

9:45-nite nite dub dub time...whenever I hear this I immediatly get VERY tired

ten firty-after scratching and bunching for the last forty five minutes, I have finaway made my bed

Ten firty five-I'm hungry..I fink I will go get some food

10:50-mommy I need back up

11:30-hmm..I fink I want to pway...with my squeaky bone

12-I'm hungry..time for midnight snack again..

thats it! Any questions?

HEY...Sannican what do you fink you're doing?!?! I'm a wittle mad right now because the seahawks wost in over time...this is ridiculous. ANyways I could easiwy erase every fing sannican just wrote, but I fought you might want to see how stupid she is. Anyways I fink I am gonna go...Aunt Smeggs is about to weave and I need to give her my best puppy dog eyes so she will give me a bag of Top Ramen..it's my favorite...Wike Papa wike son...

I miss you mama and papa

Kingston Maurie

My new sister

So I have decided that Sanican is no longer an auntie, but instead she is now my sister. Here are some concrete details as to why I have now decided to call her my sister.
1. I wiv wif her just like my papa wived with my aunties
2. I pick on her wike a sister, but it's just broverly luv
3. I am older than her and that is weird for me to call her my auntie if she is younger
4. She sticks her head in my mouf and I don't wet just anyone do that
5. I wuv her lots so she is my sister
6. I share my bubbles wif her
7. I share my room wif her when gramma and grampa weave
8. Since I no wonger have Mr. Who I need a sibwing, you don't want to raise a spoiled brat of an only child would you?

That is all the reasons I can think of right now, but with this being said, my final thoughts are this...listen closely mama and papa...if I get to move back in wif you when you come home then Sanican is coming wif me. If you don't wike this then I'm sorry I'm going to have to wiv wif my aunties then because they said this was okay wif them. Sanican wuvs you wots, not as much as me, but she wuvs you guys wots and is very excited to be my sister I cannot wet her down and weave her. Anyways I wuv you bofe very much and miss you. Sanican and I cannot wait to see you!

Wuv,
Your favorite son!

RIP Mr. Who

Bubbowls!!!

SO the uffer day Aunt Smeggs was moving out of the house to go back to skool and she was putting some stuff on the table and she found this bottle of bubbowls...the kind you bwow and they pop. Well...wittle did she know I WUV bubbowls. OH my gosh..they are so fricken cool!! Anyways she started bwowing them and I pwayed with them and bit then and chomped them..but then I needed some water cause they didnt taste very well...anyways that was my story..theres a picture of me and sanican pwaying wif them to go awong with the story. I miss you mama and papa my bottom...

Kingston Maurie

Happy birfday mama

So yesterday was my mama's birfday. Everyone say happy birfday to my mama! I made a cake for her and ate all of it for her. Actuawy I wanted to send it to her in africa but grandpa and gramma and my aunties said i cant, that is why i hate them right now. Actuawy I fink I'm just going thru my terrible 2s. Or maybe i'm not a bad dog at all and i just wiv wif mean people that don't luv me so maybe my mama and papa should just come home...and maybe they should just come home now! Actuawy maybe im just mad because aunt smeg wegs is weaving soon for school and i'm going to miss her wike i miss my mama....and sometimes papa. Actuawy maybe i'm just mad because my other auntie is so busy with schooooooooool (i hate schools, they take everyone from me) that she doesn't spend time wif me anymore. Actuawy maybe i'm just cranky.

Cheeeeeessseee!

So I fink mama and papa wike wooking at me, so I went fru aunt winzy's wap top and found my favorite pictures of myself so mama and papa can wook at me. I hope you wuv vem mama and papa!

This is me sticking my head out of the window because I want to go for a ride.

This is me pwaying wif uncle Jim. I actually jumped out to him!

Oh ya know just anover picture of my good side

I fought this one shows the half bwack in me pretty well.

Yup me and Sanican, she fowwows me wherever I go

I can be very proper if I want to be...see mama and papa I'm a good dog, so come home to me!

Whoops, how did this one get in there? Well this was when I accidentawy got into the garbage, Aunt Winz was not happy about this one. Almost not as happy as the time I ate the entire package of oreos, or the box of uncooked hamburger helper noodles or the time...actuawwy I fink I have some more pictures to show you...

This is my mama and papa with my broffers and sisters, can you beweave they visited my rewatives wifout me?

And this is my broffer that my mama and papa visited

And this is my other broffer

Well that is all for my favorite pictures of me. I hoped you wiked them mama and papa. Wuv you!

Wuv,

Your son who wives miles and miles and miles and miles and miles and miles away, come home!

P.S. RIP Mr. Who

Pop my bottom???

Papa,

What are you going to pop my bottom with? A needle?

Aunties

Today I saw Aunt Smeg Wegs AND Aunt Winz. I wuv them bery much. I wuz so excited to see Aunt Winz that I went potty right after I saw her. I awlso bit Sanican in the head. She deeeeserrved it tho cuz she bit frew Aunt Winz's computer cord. Anyways that is it. I just wanted to say how much I wuv my aunties. And my gramma and grawmpa. And my momma and papa (jerks!). And sometimes I even wuv Sanican and stinky dog. I hate cats!

Wuv,
Kingston M.

P.S. Come home now Mama and Papa!

oopsie daisies

I just wuv Saturdays. Aunt Smeggs calls me up on the bed on saturdays. (She awso does this every week night at free in the morning subconsciouswy, and when I jump up there she gets mad at me and I say you cawled me up Aunt Smeggs...then she says "You're lyin King" and then I say "Aunt Smeggs how did you know I starred in the wion king?" and then she fawls asweep) I also wuv Saturdays cause it's when Gwrampa forgives me for what I did wast night. Well this is how it all started. So I was outside staring down Snickers (She was on the roof) and I was just ready to pounce and bite her head off (Cause she awlways does this weird breaving fing when I come around...it bugs me) so I was sitting there wike a good dog when awl of a sudden Fozzie (the stinky dog thats AWLWAYS SCARED) barks. Well...uhh...he was inside and I was out so I start running full speed to go to his rescue when awl of a sudden...WHAM..."what the hell was that?" (Sorry mama...it was just a heat of the moment fing) and I wook around and I am still outside even though I ran full speed ahead into the kitchen. It was wike an invisibowl force field stopped me from running. Gwrandma was worried about me (thats why I wuv her more than gwrampa) cause whatever that was hurt a wot. Gwrampa though was worried more about the big hole in the "invisibowl forcefield" that he now was cawling the screen door. I don't fink I have ever seen Gwrampa so mad before. I was just trying to rescue Fozzie...thats awl.... Well anyways that was my story for the night and why I wuv Saturdays. And awlso mama and papa usuawy call on Saturdays (hint hint)

I wuv you mama and papa
Kingston Maurie (a.k.a. The Wion King)

Mama and Papa where are you?

I'm actwually getting mad at mama and papa (jerks) for not weaving me any comments. I am writing this for vem. No more bwogs til I get comments!

Your wuving and kareing son,
Kingston M.

R.I.P Mr. Who

My day at camp

So uhh I forgot to write about my first and wast day at camp. So Aunt Winz thought she could foohwl me when mama and papa weft (jerks) and make me fink that they didn't and brought me to camp. Wittle did she know that I knew all awong. That isnt the point tho. I fink my other favorite pwace to go besides bwwwuuueee wakkeee is camp. Wet me tell you a wittle about my day.

First, Aunt Winz wet me ride in her new car all the way to camp, I really wuv her new car! When I got to camp I met about 7 kids. Aunt Winz told them rules that they had to follow wif me, but she didn't hear me tell all ov them to not follow rules and that she wuz just herkin' their gerkin. I fink I have two favorite new frienz from camp, Awex and Iris. They took me to PE where I got to run wif them around DTP, I fink it stands for Duck Toiwet Pond. Then I went on a hike in outdoors where I chased two squirrels. The kids told me to keep my eyes open for the hobos and coyotes that wiv in the woods, I didn't see any though. Then during snack time kidz kept feeding me snacks when Aunt Winz wasn't wooking. I fink I have a new found wuv for carwwots. I fink my eyes can see better because I ate so many of em.

Anyways so my buddy Awex and I ate wunch together and he told all of the kids that I was his weindeer. I always thought I had part weindeer in me, that Awex is one smart cookie. Awex also frew grapes for me. One time he put the grapes in my chuck it and frew it that way. That was a wot of fun.

Well I gotta go now. Just fought you would want to hear about my day at camp. Hi Mama and Papa!

My Trip to Bwuuuue Waaaake

Weeeeell uhhh see I figure I might as well write a bwog just wike mama and papa. I fought everyone would wanna know what Kingston Maurie was up to also. I know in a few weeks my fame will surpass mama and papas. I'm stiwl a wittle mad at mama and papa for weaving me AGAIN (jerks). It's awright though...I get spoiled by Gwramma and Gwrampa and Auntie Winz and Aunt Smeggs enough to make up for it.

So uhh to take my mind off mama and papa weaving me (jerks), Gwramma and Gwrampa brought me to my favorite pwace in the whole wide world. Bwuuuue Waaaake. It was a week fuwl of adventure, and frowing the baseball, and going for walks, and swimming...and this time I showed aunt smeggs how to "ghost ride the whip". Why don't we just start wif the ride over. I got to ride in my crate wif my fur bwowing in the wind the whole time.



If you don't know me very well then you wouldn't know that I WUV my fur bwowing in the wind. But I do. Free and a hawlf hours of pure wind in my fur. When we got to Bwuuue Waaake it was dark outside but I still ran around and pwayed in the grass.

Sunday was the first day I went swimming. We went to the Robinsons pwace...which is definatewy my favorite. They have a dock and pwenty of water for me to go swimming in and pwenty of room for me to frowic in the grass. My weast favorite part vough is when I fewl in the water. I was on the dock and Aunt Smeggs was in the water wif my ball. Well if you know me I will do almost anyfing for my ball. So I got to the end of the dock and almost went in....but I waited a wittle bit and then finally I couldn't do it anymore... I jumped in off the dock...and then I sank...but popped back up and got my bawl of course.


The tuff part was trying to get back up. Aunt Smeggs saved me though.

Anover part that was so much fun was getting yummy breakfast every morning. (And mama and papa wonder how I gained 10 pounds while they were gone)

I am very good at pwaying catch...especuwy when it's sausage.

I also went intertubing...april foows...I just wanted gwrampa to get a picture of my good side.

The day Mr. Who died, Gwramma and Aunt Smeggs felt bad for me. So I got to pway extra chuck-it, swimm a wot and practice on my staying.



Once again I wanted Gwrampa to get a picture of my good side

This is a picture of me and Aunt Smeggs Weggs..She is telling me to stay...and weeeellll uhhh ...I am



But all the pwaying sure makes for a good sweep...in between my two aunties. They like to call me their ADT

Weeelll uhh I may be scary for those bad guys but I am awso a gentow giant when it comes to babies.

Although I don't have a picture of me riding in the golf cart, I did go for pwenty of rides. The last one the most memorable. I was riding wif Gwramma and Aunt Smeggs and was weaning my head out the side and I said "Aunt Smeggs watch me ghost ride the whip" And I jumped out of the golf cart, barrel rolled and got back up and ran next to the golf cart. It was so much fun. I fought I had to represent the west side and show everyone whats up.

The best ending to every day though was watching stars next to a fire. I saw 5 shooting stars and here is what I wished for

1. Mama and Papa will come home and never weave me again (jerks).

2. Mama and Papa will not go back a fird year

3. Sani-can (the ugwy white dog) will finawy stop herkin my gerkin

4. Mama and Papa will jump out and surprise me

5. Mama and Papa will come home and pway chuck-it wif me

and of couse awong with watching stars I wuved roasting marshmewwos and making s'mores


(Yes I am holding a roasting stick wif a marshmewwo at the end)


Weeell uhh thats the end of my bwuuuue waaake trip. Stay tuned for more stories from The Wife and Times of Kingston Maurie