I am thee new Kingston M. "Furminator" Swater

Aww man I cannot tell you uhh how much I wuv this new brush gramma got for me, her favorite grandson. It's uh called a fur fur furminator. It's actuawy called a furminator, but I wike adding the extra furs because it sounds coower when I say it wike that. Anyways this thing is the best fing since scooby roo snacks.

So here's how my first fur fur furminating experience went. Aunt Winz started to brush me, and I felt wike I was in heaven. I actuawy fell asweep about four times while she was doing it. When I woke up I was on the kitchen fwoor with a huge pile of my fur next to me. I fought for a second Aunt Winz was herkin my gerkin, I was afraid I might be shaved or possibwy red white and bwue wike Sanican once was. But I wasn't. I gwanced at my back end (wike I did that one time I ate half the bag of doggie treats papa) and my hair was still there. Anyways I decided that I need not worry so I went back to sweep because the fur fur furminator felt so freakin good.

Aunt Winz furminated me for about an hour and she ended up filling 2 grocery bags full of my fur. I am now the silkiest puppy you will ever meet. The only possible way I can get any silkier is if I eat an entire box of scooby roo snacks because they're good for my coat. I cannot wait for my mama and papa to come home because they can even feel for themselves. I am wike a whole new dog after this fur fur furminator. It really is unbewievable. I will try and post pictures but Aunt Winz took em' wif her new phone and she needs to downwoad the software for them to woad. You can't really tell the difference by wooking though, you have to feel me. So mama and papa why don't you just come home earwee. Aunt Winz is so impressed by my new fur that she says she will even wet me ride in her new car! I reawwy cannot wait for everyone to pet me.

Anyways I hope everyone else out there with old yucky hair is as fortunate as me to get a fur fur furminator. It reawwy is worf the money, it even works on kitties! Anyways I'm off to sneak some scooby roo snacks to make my coat even shinier. I wuv the furminator!!!!

Wuv,
Kingston M. "Furminator" Swater