Guess who's back?

...back again...Kingston's back...tewl a friend. Yes that's right! I'm back...and there's a new wittle one in town. He goes by the name of Brayby and I reawwy don't wike him. I don't know what kind of animaw he is, but he wooks a wot wike a mini papsa, wif a hint of momsa..but not too much cause he's a boy. But I reawwy don't see what the big fuss (no pun intended) is about. He doesn't feed himself, he can't walk, he can't even speak and scare off predators wike me. He's awake at the wrong times and makes mamsa and papsa get outta bed and makes papsa reawwy cranky.

I have to tip toe around this wittle fing and when he's sweeping and someone rings the doorbell I'm not supposed to bark? I don't get these ruwes. I can't chomp him eiver...which is what I would wuuuuv to do.

Wet me tell you about my wife before this wittle terror came into my wife. Well Mamsa started growing a watermelon in her bewwy and she stayed home every day wif me. We got coffee and treats at our favorite coffee stand, and watched movies and pwayed wif my chuck it. Every day, me and mamsa. Then one earwy morning mamsa and papsa weft in the middle of the night and weft me by my wonesome. Grandma saved me cause I had to go potty and I swept at her house...and then the next day mamsa and papsa brought Brayby home. The end of the rest of my wife. I no wonger get wuv..my aunties come over and barewy pay attention to me. They just "wuuuv Brayby" and want to squeeze him and kiss him...while I want the same fing..but nooooo I'm just in the way and too woud and too big to sit on your wap.

A few fings I wike about Brayby....

1. He goes well wif mashed potatoes (and Brayby)

...I may have to fink harder on that more..I can't fink of anyfing else at the moment...

And just to cwarify I onwy go into his room once in a while a night to check and see if he's been shipped to Africa yet...

Anyways I know it's been awhile and I haven't updated my bwog in wike 14 years now, so I hope you enjoyed it..I know I sure did..I needed to rant about stupid Brayby...anyways its off to bed..SWEEPOVER!

Is it summer already? Then where are mama and papa

Well.. uhh...I don't reawy have an excuse for why it has taken me so wong to update my bwog (can't reawy bwame me..I get it from my papa..)but today was a beautifuw day...sun was shining...gwramma and aunt smeggs were home...and welll uh...my stuffed animal was out in the grass when I went out there. So it reminded me that mama and papa are usuawy home when its sunny out. Well aunt smeggs and Gwramma went to some fing called the daffodiw parade to watch daffodiws or somefing wike that. So when they got back they opened the gwass door and I could walk frough that invisible forcefield whenever I pweased to go frowick in my jungle. Anyways Gwramma cweaned out my guest house (as seen in my bwog entitled "mtv called me up and wanted a tour of my krib") and its pretty cool in there now. And well..uhh Aunt Smegg Weggs got out the golf kart to drive around a wittle bit..(she forgot me though)..and we all just soaked up some sun...but mama and papa aren't home..where are you?!?! Anyways...thats about it...oh and Sannican.."ITS AUNT SANNICAN, KINGSTON!!!"...no way am I cawing her aunt sannican...but anyways sannican got a pedicure..."it's called a pet-i-cure kingston"...jeeze dumb-dumb stop interrupting me...well she got a "pet-i-cure" today...by Aunt smegg weggs..and now her toenails are bright pink...but she couldn't stay still wong enough to paint her back toe nails...she was searching for her ball while Aunt smegg weggs was painting her front nails...Well thats about it...

Wuv you Mama and Papa

Kingston

Uh oh..spaghetti-o's

Well uhh...before I begin my story wet me remind you mama and (pwease don't) papa (my bottom) that it has been a very wong time since I have done this.

Well uhh..it all begins Friday night when Gwramma and Aunt Smegg Weggs were out at Sumners tawent show.

Gwramma had made a reawy good roast for dinner and because Aunt Smeggs got home so wate they were in a rush to get out the door and get to Sumner. Well they weft the roast out on the counter and I reawy reawy tried not to eat it but it just smelled SO GOOD! Well uhh I'm not very good at wying, so when Gwramma and Aunt Smeggs got home they knew something was wrong.



It took them a while to realize what was missing (cause I didnt weave a crumb on the fwoor) but then Gwramma said..." There wasn't any roast left on that plate was there." I was caught. So of course Gwramma got mad at me....(But of course I am smiwing cause I am such a good charmer)

Gwramma forgot all about it cause I was being so cute...

And wawa...before you know it..Gwramma compwetwy forgot about it...:-D

And now we're best fwriends again
Wuv you mama and (pwease don't) papa (my bottom),

Kingston M.

P.S. Wet me just remind you once more mama and (pwease don't) papa (my bottom) that this was the first time this year that I have eaten somefing off the counter

MTV called me up and wanted a tour of my "Krib"

Welcome to my Krib

Wet's start wif my favorite part...the toys

These two are my favorites...Meet Snickers and Sandy

This is where the magic happens...the wuv sack

Welcome to my kitchen..anuver one of my favorite pwaces

Whats a kitchen wifout food..I'm a pretty simple dog sticking to a diet of dog food and water, wif the occasional scooby snack

Welcome to the Wiving room..no pwaying is awwowed in here...Gwramma says "I just vacuumed you guys and you're gonna leave paw prints everywhere"...frankwy I wike to call it "faux paw" Gwramma.

I am pretty spoiled...welcome to my hair sawon. If you were wondering how I am so handsome you are wookin at it...the furr furr furrminator. I'm in heaven whenever my aunties furminate me.

This is my jungle. I'm "King of the Jungle" at my Krib. I have acctuawy set up defense mechanisms all around the perimeter called wand mines that gwramma keeps stepping on and detonating them prematurewy.

This is where all my homie's stay when they come over...its my two story guest dog house. Now, wets go out front and take a wook at all my whips.

These whips are onwy used for special occasions wike going to the park or picking up mama and papa from the airport or going to bwuuuue wake This is my everyday summer ride. I wike to ghost ride the whip on this golf cart. Maybe next summer mama and papa will see me do it.
Of course 0ne of my most frequented whip is my weash seen here...yes its wightning bwue... And of course we can't forget about my crate. Sometimes I miss riding in it so much I just way in it just because

Well now you've seen my crib but I've got to go pway chuck-it wif my aunties so I fink it's time for you to weave now...

Kingston M. aka Attack Dog

So uhhh i have decided to try out a new profession...guard dogging! There have been a few occasions wately where I have needed to be ferocious (wike the wion that I am) to scare away a few people at the door wate at night. Gramma says how proud of me she is every time I do this, so I fink I might try it as a new profession. This does mean I have to change a few of my daywee rituals tho. From now on I have opted out of sweeping on mama and papas bed and instead I sneak out and sweep by the door each night. Gramma doesn't even make me.

Aunt Smeggs and Aunt Winz are helping me train. Sometimes they pway weird noises on the computer or I see dogs on tv that look like they're in the house and I sometimes hav false awarms. The other day gramma and aunt smeggs were watching the dog show and I swear one of the dogs jumped out of the tv and tried to get my gramma. So I ran full speed from the other end of the house to get the dog in the room, but I wasn't quick enough, by the time I made it to the rec room it jumped back into the tv. It must have seen me coming after him. I stood at the tv and barked at him and wet him know there would be no more of that nonsense and to weave my girls awone!

I did have a real false awarm though. Aunt Winz was pwaying a video of me barking and I accidentawee fought it was another dog....that's why I say I'm a guard dog in training. Anyways maybe after I get good enough I can eventuawee go from guard dog to wion dog. I mean, wook at me, I really think I look wike a wion.

Can you tell what one is me?

thats bull shih t

Yes...thats exactly right...I went for a walk today wif my wonderful aunt smegg weggs and because it was rather wet and cold, sannican had her bwack and pink fwuffy shirt on. Well uh...this attracted the attention of another wonderful dog walker who stopped to admire my handsomeness and also inquire about that ugwy white fwuffy fing. So Aunt Smegg Weggs said she was a maltipoo and he said his dog was a bull terrier and a Shih Tzu mix....now if you have ever seen dumb and dumber, you would have already noticed the hiwarity of that breed of dog...its kinda wike breeding a bull dog and shih tzu. Anyways...if you haven't gotten my joke yet..the dog was a bull shih t. Anyways...after that part of my walk, we decided to keep going but ugwy white dog was being a brat and didn't want to walk "because my paws are wet Kingston" so we turned around and came home...only to find out the real reason sannican couldn't walk...she had to go potty and didn't want to do it in pubwic...she has a fear of pubwic restrooms. Anyways all else is gwreat here at gwrammas pwace. Miss you mama and papa.

Wuv,

Kingston M.

Sandy's in heat

...nuff said..

Kingston M.